Walking And Napping But Not Gambling

Jul 17, 2011 by

I’m getting too fat for my comfort. I’m existing in a state of exhaustion. I’m on the run too much.

And I’m happy.

Since I’m working on taking better care of myself I went back to sleep this morning. I was feeling lonely when I woke up so I ate some breakfast and went for a walk at a park. While I was out and about I called my friend to catch up with her. I came back home and took another nap.

I’m feeling so much better now. I’m refreshed. I’ve been pushing myself too hard and everything around me seemed to be crumbling. Picture a juggler with 10 balls in the air and one by one they are hitting the ground. I’m used to escaping into the world of smoke and neon. That’s what brought me comfort for quite a few years. Actually dealing with life has a tendency to be strenuous still.

But I Love it.

I know, without a doubt, that if I was still caught up in my gambling addiction that my life wouldn’t be nearly as fulfilling. I would be blowing off my responsibilities, creating debt for myself and ruining my relationships. Nothing would be as important as my gambling…at least that is how it was a few short years ago.

I had to struggle to take a walk, even though it was one of my favorite things to do. I forced myself to nap because I stayed up all night gambling.

Life is better now. I’m so glad to be out of the frenzy of the gambling losses and chasing. I have other forms of excitement these days. Every day I continue to learn and grow. I consider myself blessed.

I am lucky I made it out alive. There is hope. Just hang on. You aren’t alone.

 

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